April 30, 2016

Because I am in hope with him!




Dear Papa,



I know you worry a lot for me. I can always sense the tornado of anxiety in your veins and spot the multitude of apprehensions on your skin. I do not blame you. Categorically, your concern and care are manifestations of your benign affection. I fully understand the perilous times we live in and how the poignant articles in newspapers, sensational stories on news channels and quirky gossips from the neighborhood inflate your fears. One of your major worries is finding a suitable guy for me or perhaps me falling for a wrong guy. Albeit your fear is innate and genuine, like that of any other parent, I have something to confess. Lend me your ears as you have been doing, this time a little more patiently.



I like somebody, Papa. Hold on! Don't get mad at me! Listen unassumingly, please. I never say that your choice would have been any lesser. I know you would have left no stone unturned to find the best suitor for me. But since I found one earlier and made my choice, I want you to know him,succinctly though, through my eyes glasses. 



His name, caste, age, height, salary and other information which you ought to know are written in the other envelope. But are these the most important metrics to determine the suitability of a person as your daughter's life partner? No na? I beg you to take a look at the other envelope later and read further to know the answers to the umpteen questions that are tangled in your mind right now. 



Well, who is he? He is perfectly imperfect;he is real, as real as real can get. It's natural for him to show his love or anger anytime to anybody, un-apologetically. He is never afraid to cry, like you Papa. He will be the first one to say sorry in a scuffle, regardless of the fact whose fault it was. He is a dreamer. No, I'm not being poetic. He dreams of all the riches in the world, a tour to Europe, a Porsche, an ambitious career, only that he wants me to be a part of his every little endeavor. We will rock the world together is what he says.  



He has more confidence in me and my abilities, than I myself have. He has not promised me moons and fortunes, but a morning cuppa tea. He is not the one who would open car door for me; instead he would prefer me at the driver's seat, and make me learn driving and conquer my fears. He is not the one who would remember each and every date or anniversary because all he is thinking is to make my 'today' beautiful. He will not bring flowers and chocolates for me every now and then but will get me a yoga mat, a neck pillow, Oats and Chocos packets or a diary for me to scribble. He encourages me to write more often and get published some day, like you do Papa. He never lets me give up, as he himself never does.



He loves himself a lot. Isn't it a beautiful thing to do? His self esteem is unshakable. The inner child in him still roams freely and plays around, and this is something he takes pride in. He loves his family even more and has his small little plans for everybody- his siblings, his mom and his father. He gets attached to people very easily and knows very well to bolster up the bond and sustain the relations. He has friends for whom he is always ready to walk the extra mile, and so would they for him. Through his subtle ways, he can charm the people alike, no matter they are in a conference room or in a drawing room!



He has his share of flaws,failures, struggles and successes. I have witnessed his best side and worse side and I chose both and so did he. I do not claim he is the best guy in the world. He is not an award or a trophy I would like to win. He makes me laugh and he makes me dream and that suffices. 



This is just his silhouette, Papa. If you decide to meet him, perhaps you can get to know him more and think through completely. I am asking you to trust me as you did when I walked my first few steps. I am asking you to give me a chance because I am in hope with him, because ten years down the line neither me nor you would want to regret "What if I said 'Yes' ". 



You have a choice to make Papa, either you can pick that other envelope and look for his caste or you can give me a call right away. Or wait! You can open the door as well. I am standing right outside, waiting for a hug!



-Your Daughter



PS: You matter most to me, always and forever!


April 27, 2016

I'm an Ordinary Man!













Plain
Simple
Common
Mediocre
Unsophisticated
I'm an Ordinary man!

With small fortune
and equally small ability
I take Life
as it comes
making joyous compromises
each day
every moment
I'm an Ordinary man!

I'm not perfect
Neither do I have an extra-ordinary talent
I'm no stylish,no special
my heart doesn't desire much.
I have my warts and weaknesses
in full acceptance
Slow and stupid
many a times
I'm an Ordinary man!

My world is narrowly confined
to the immediate ambience
where I often cultivate
broad-mindedness.
I have a small family
and few friends
I love them a lot
they love me too
I'm an Ordinary man!

I'm unnoticeable in the crowd
unobserved I travel down the paths
I'm never a 'centre of attraction'
I'm seldom highlighted
or paid attention
I'm an Ordinary man!

I do not always know
which way to go
my dreams are little
my prayers big
I take second chances
but not too many 'risks'
I'm an Ordinary man!

I say no to tyranny
to power
to things unethical
of which
I'm the ultimate sufferer
Very calmly I intake
all injustice
without any resistance
'coz I'm an Ordinary man!

The mere absence of sadness
makes me happy
I'm astouded
by natural beauty
I can be innocent
and simultaneously wise
I'm living a very ordinary life
I'm an Ordinary man!

I do not have a vision
Or a purpose dignified
I live life on the daily basis
Trying to push things in hand
A little up
A little higher
every moment
so as to 'not lose'
Seeking happiness
in small little pleasures
trying best
not to be unkind
I’m an ordinary man!

Unknown,Unspoken
Unlamented I'll die one day
My name will not be etched
anywhere in space and time
'cept in the hearts of few akin
I’m an ordinary man!

But I'm not alone you see
there are many,untold like me
living a tiny
yet satisfying life
Plain
Simple
Common
Mediocre
Unsophisticated
Happy
Contented
ORDINARY!

I Await You!


Like a coarse tiny vapor
arrested amidst the black clouds
fighting tough to reach out
waiting to be sculptured
into a beautiful white pearl!

Like an unborn dream
in the womb of the heavens
traversing through crests and troughs
seeking for a worthier doer!

Like the darkest hour before dawn
waiting to bathe in the orange light
to exempt all grief amalgamated over night
and zealous to start anew!

Like an eternal prayer of all souls
of hope and happiness
and of love and madness
waiting to be ascertained by the one above!

Like the other half of crescent moon
counterpoised by the beholder
owing to the radiance of it's better half
waiting to aglow to it's full glory!

I Await You!


The Eloquent Silence



















Here as I stand on the kerb of my balcony,
Forlorn, wretched ,as if a woe betide.
Venturing to unravel the bizarre cacophony,
Of the reapers and the sailors ,of the tits and the tides.

The pluvial pearls pattering the floor,
Songbirds crooning hitherto to azure.
And the quavering foliage whispering in my ears,
Crescending the tumult, the windy veers.

Townies trundling , Oh! the tittle-tattle meet,
Kids making merry, boys strumming down the streets.
Hawkers howling at the vortex of the voice,
Adding to the bongo, the banger device.

Even the artifacts ,the clock ,ticking at pace,
The wind chimes jingling ,perhaps struggling in the race.
Then the phone bell ranged ,oaf, another cry,
And there in the kitchen ,the vent blew high.

Ah! all judders ..hammering my tympanum,
Be it whispers, slurps,ditty or hum.
For everything is sonorous ,and everyone has to aver,
Save two in the milieu ,the quietus ever.......

Quietus ever , I couldn’t make out why?
All seasons ,all occasions , tacit and shy.
Perhaps abstaining ,from escalating the symphony,
Or are the sole listeners , of all enigma, all euphony.

But silence is also the veneer of noise,
Eventually thwarted ,revealed in disguise.
Still they are mute, subdued ,and might remain to be,
The Savior the Mighty ,and the Solitary Me…


I want you to cry tonight



Today I won't droop your shoulders
with the burden of indefinite hope
Neither would I crumple your eyes
to another aura of sleepless dreams.
I won't blabber philosophies today
'It's Destiny','Move on','Such is Life' and so on
Nor will I sink in the sea of emotions
to wet you in the showers of sympathy.

Instead I want you to cry tonight,
Yes do that,it's a begging plea
reel of your pain,let tears tumble down your cheeks
which might be aching owing to fake smiles
Don't make your wounds rot 
Don't pretend as if everything's okay when it's not,It hurts
Don't act wise,I cognize you are broken inside !
Let your mind accede to the failure
and lament aloud,very loud
until it outbursts your agony.
Don't be hesitant of the otherwise ruthless world
Nobody will see your break down,I promise.
I'll shut mine eyes too and turn my back,if you desire !
But please cry,cry for once
and let your heart be dried of sorrows
your soul redeem of yesterdays residues !

For O dearest, I empathize
with the irreplaceable loss incurred on you
And so I want you not to just escape it
under the refuge of hope,dream,destiny or sympathy
but instead triumph over it
on the chariot of your own WILL
with the sword of your infinite virtues !

I'm waiting to see you soar high,again
Let You be dawned forever!

Love unconfessed...














Dearest You,

The YOUness in YOU

I Appreciate
I Admire
I Respect
and I ..........

II.
Though I could ne'er see
laughter ripples on your face
or hug you tight
when you really need one.
Though I could ne'er
wipe off  tears
rolling down your cheeks
or hold them in my palm
as precious pearls.
Though I could ne'er
walk with you at a starlit night,
holding hands,silently
taking all your fears away.
Though I could ne'er arrange
surprises on  your birthdays
or celebrate life
un-occasionally.
Though I could ne'er
lend you my ears
or offer my shoulders
in moments of pain.
Though I could ne'er give you
'a gift' which you like
just to see a smile
on your tired face.
Though I could ne'er hold
tears of joy
for your small little
accomplishments.
Though I could ne'er tell you
that ' I LIKE YOU'
coz I understand  you deserve much better
why to bother you,unnecessarily .
Still  O Sweetest heart
I care for you
from a distance though!!!

for
The YOUness in YOU
I Appreciate
I Admire
I Respect
and I ..........

III.

I do not exactly remember
when did it all began
you became a priority
in my daily prayers.
To every cheerful face
I come across
'Smiling with a spark'
I feel you!
Whenever I espy
a shooting star
I just wish
for your wish come true.
My dreams often
bless your dreams
with my soul sincerely yearning
for your happiness and esteem.
Whenvever I turn the pages of newspaper
to read horoscope of the day
it's your's always
which I read first!
I do not know why
but when it comes to judging people
guys particularly,I compare them to thee
and unsurprisingly none matches up!
That day also
I believed in your dreams
today also I assert
You'll be a great man one day!
Whenever I'm sad
and cry my heart out
I know you can never be there
Still,I only think of you!
I often convey my love
to butterflies and sparrows and winds
I hope they carry it to you
unknowingly though!

for
The YOUness in YOU
I Appreciate
I Admire
I Respect
and I love!


IV:
I won't measure my love-true love,deep love,mad love ,selfless love etc etc.It's unimportant.Let it be just LOVE for the sake of LOVE.I just wish for your happiness,that you live all your dreams.

I'll never confess it to you.Never.Few things are best when left unsaid.I comprehend you have a lot of aspirations from yourself ,from life where I somehow do not fit in. You truly deserve an angel who'll love you heart and soul and will get your love in return.And for this I have no regrets, no grievances towards God,towards you,towards me or any other.It's destiny,I apprehend.As I said your happiness is of paramount importance to me . May you get the best in life!

Another important thing here is that I LOVED.Yes surprisingly ,I loved someone and I'm happy about it and the best thing is that I Loved YOU.(Hey would you believe that ever since I have known you I did not have had even a crush on anybody else?Forget about attraction ,lol :P.It's been some twelve years.Long time,no?).Yeah it's like that.

My love is not the greatest of all.It might not grow with time for togetherness is essential for that.But my love for you will remain as it is.You'll always be in my thoughts and prayers,and that's a promise.Love(for me) was tough.Unloving is tougher,in fact un-achievable.

The fact is that I do not deserve YOU.
The truth is that I'll always love you,from a distance though!!
Take care.

Sigh!

Could ne'er be Yours
Me